


Another Saturday night

by sunshinsou



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Break Up Talk, Crying, Emotional, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Pain, Post-Canon, Sad, Short One Shot, Spoilers, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:41:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27795556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinsou/pseuds/sunshinsou
Summary: Oikawa and Iwaizumi have been dating since high school, but life isn't exactly making it easy for them.[ This is set after the manga, so it has spoilers for what Oikawa's and Iwaizumi's lives look like after the time skip. It's not mentioned a lot, or focused on, but still ]
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	Another Saturday night

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I wrote this. I only read this once, so if it's totally incoherent, I'm sorry. I just needed to write something, and Iwaoi is kind of my go-to, so enjoy this short mess.

Another Saturday night. There was nothing really special about what they had been doing, but it was good enough for them.

Seeing each other had been somewhat of a rare occasion after Oikawa permanently moved to Argentina. It was easier than when they had both been travelling after high school though. With both of them settled down, they at least had the possibility to schedule visits and make sure they actually got to see each other.

Sure, it was still tough, but they didn’t like to think about it. They didn’t like to talk about it. That’s what Iwaizumi always said at least. Any time Oikawa would make a joke about it, Iwaizumi would feel his heart beat a bit more rapidly in his chest. It hurt. That’s why he never added on, why he never teased about it, why he never even wanted to even think about it.

At some point, Oikawa had gotten the message. They didn’t have to say anything else to know they both felt the same way about it.

With both of them back in Japan for a couple weeks, they had managed to escape most of these thoughts. There was another week left until the setter went back to his new home. Luckily, the fact that Oikawa wouldn’t be lying in his arms like this by then, had stayed off his mind so far.

Iwaizumi felt free, mostly. His life was pretty good, and while he couldn’t say entering a relationship by the end of their third year in high school, even though they knew they had entirely different plans, was the smartest thing he’d ever done, he didn’t regret it one bit.

No, he absolutely wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. Well, maybe for a relationship, in which they actually lived together, but he knew better than that.

Both of them had their ambitions, and neither would give up on their dream to be with the other. He was glad it wasn’t an entirely black-and-white, either-or situation though. They could have both. Each other, and their dreams. They still had these moments.

Ones like this one.

Oikawa, head resting on his chest as they both lay in bed. Iwaizumi, playing with his hair as his eyes closed by themselves. It was late, but neither of them wanted to sleep yet, even though both of them were tired.

It hadn’t been a long day. In fact, it had been spent in a rather wholesome way. They had planned on staying in, cooking something and binge watching some new documentary about UFOs, that Oikawa had discovered. Seriously, how was this guy still obsessed with those things?

It had made Iwaizumi smile unwillingly when he suggested it though. It felt like home.

Their plans didn’t quite work out. The kitchen almost burned down, when they got distracted by making out, instead of paying attention to what was on the stove. Luckily, they managed to put out the small fire, and the dramatic details were added on by Oikawa, who had to explain to his mother why he forgot to call after dinner.

So, they had ended up ordering take out. It hadn’t been amazing, but it was good enough to make them fell so full, they could barely move. It probably added to their tiredness.

In all honesty, Iwaizumi was about to doze off, when he heard Oikawa make a sound. He slowly blinked awake again, trying to figure out if it was just his boyfriend talking in his sleep, or if it was something important.

When he moved a bit, so he could get up, Oikawa backed off in surprise, but was clinging to his chest again a moment later.

Confused, Iwaizumi tried to just wait for him to say something, but there was nothing. Just their breathing.

It was enough to notice that something was off though. Oikawa’s breaths seemed quick, and shallow. It was worrying, of course it was, especially with how desperate he seemed to hold on to him.

Instinctively, Iwaizumi wrapped his arms around the man, pulling him even closer, if that was possible.

Oikawa let out a shaky breath, relief.

It left Iwaizumi more confused, but he knew better than to press for an explanation. It would come, or it wouldn’t. Either way was fine.

Over the past few years, they had done their best to find a way to communicate without pressuring the other to talk about something that could possibly make the situation worse. It didn’t take long for both of them to realize that they were better at doing it through physical gestures.

Offering comfort turned into offering hugs, kisses, massages, anything that could help relax. Wanting to be comforted was quickly recognizable by the way they actively sought out some sort of touch.

Of course, they didn’t just touch when they were upset, but it was different when they were. Gentle, careful, fearful even. And of course, the whole being apart for most of the time didn’t really help. It didn’t make things hard exactly. Well, it did, compared to how much better they might feel if they just hugged it out, but it wasn’t unbearable. They found different ways to cope when they weren’t close.

Sometimes, when they were desperate enough, ranting about whatever was the problem over facetime worked. It wasn’t perfect, but they always found their ways.

That’s why, when Oikawa started shaking, breaths turning into gasps, Iwaizumi knew that he just needed to wait. He held onto him, pressed soft kisses to the top of his head, rocked him back and forth, and eventually started humming softly. It wasn’t enough to fully calm him down though. So, when they had been sitting there like that for about five minutes, Iwaizumi loosened his grip just enough to grab his phone.

It was still connected with his Bluetooth box across the room, back from when they had tried to cook. Lucky. He quickly pressed down on his screen a few times, and right as Oikawa sobbed again, soft music started playing.

It was a playlist they had made together. At first it was just songs Oikawa liked to listen to when he was missing Iwaizumi, and somewhat of a private thing. Hearing about it though, made him realize that his boyfriend valued these obnoxiously cheesy things more than he had originally believed. It ended up as their project. They kept adding songs, mostly slow, gentle ones. They’d play it whenever they felt this type of way. Sad, melancholic, emotional, raw.

Sometimes, they’d facetime, just to listen to it together and feel a bit closer to each other. Even though Iwaizumi would never admit it, it worked wonders.

Thinking about their many coping mechanisms for when they were down made him feel sad sometimes. Things weren’t horrible, but they would be a lot easier if they were different.

In moments like these, he was happy about them though, thankful to know so much about the man he loved, about what could help, what wouldn’t.

It paid off, because it took less than a song for Oikawa to calm down a bit. His face was no longer entirely hidden, and Iwaizumi saw how red it was. Tear-stained, puffy, snotty. It was a little disgusting, but he couldn’t even waste a second thought on that.

He brushed the hair out of his face, reached for a tissue, and started wiping his face clean.

Surprised, when he could have sworn, he heard a chuckle, he pulled away a bit and looked at Oikawa again. He was smiling a little, even though he still looked upset. “I know we’ve been together for a while, Iwa-chan, but I think wiping my nose for me is a new level of intimacy we’ve reached just now.”

God, how badly he wanted to scowl, but he couldn’t help it. He was just relieved, that Oikawa was finding his wits again… or something. “Idiot,” he muttered, leaning down to press a kiss to his – now clean, you’re welcome – lips.

Oikawa kissed back, slow, intentional, like he didn’t just go through a whirlwind of emotions. He wasn’t fine, but he was better.

Slowly, they parted again, and Iwaizumi had to find Oikawa looking back at him with new tears forming in his eyes. The brunette smiled, then frowned, and Iwaizumi brought a hand up to his cheek. He softly caressed it, leaning in again, to rest their foreheads against each other.

Oikawa had told him many times, that if anyone knew how good he was at comforting, no one would be scared of him anymore. Iwaizumi had told him to shut up. He never knew who would actually fear him anyway, and he was convinced Oikawa was biased when it came to judging his comforting skills.

Right now, though, when Oikawa closed his eyes, and let out another sigh, he felt like he might be able to at least create a scenario for him, where he didn’t feel totally stressed out. That made him feel a little proud.

He closed his eyes, but snapped them open again when Oikawa opened his mouth. He wanted him to know that he was right there, paying attention to everything he’d say. But it closed again, and he frowned.

This time, when he hugged him again, Oikawa was forced to sit up a bit more, but he didn’t protest. He didn’t seem to mind at all, as he snuck his own arms around Iwaizumi’s waist, and pulled him in closer.

It wasn’t necessarily a good sign, but Iwaizumi ended up smiling to himself anyway. He felt good about being wanted like this, being able to help his boyfriend somehow at least.

He ended up resting his head on the guy’s shoulder, right next to his ear. When he let out a breath, he felt Oikawa shudder a bit, before tightening his grip.

“What’s on your mind?” Iwaizumi finally asked, and he felt Oikawa sink into him entirely. He might have gone too far just now, he couldn’t tell. Maybe Oikawa hadn’t wanted that push. “It’s okay,” he quickly added, more quietly, hoping it was enough to make him relax, in case he had felt pressured just now.

There was nothing for a while. Just the two of them, breathing the same air, holding onto each other, like it’s the only way to get through this. And maybe it was. He wasn’t quite sure.

Finally, movement. He could feel Oikawa shifting. He was trying to move without letting go. It was stupid, but it was his choice, so Iwaizumi didn’t even think about backing away to make it easier for him. If he did, he’d probably just earn a complaint and they might go back to zero.

When Oikawa stopped, his head was buried in Iwaizumi’s neck. He pressed a soft kiss to it, then moved again to kiss his shoulder. It was so gentle, it gave him goosebumps. Then, eventually, he heard a rough voice. Not even the crying had him sounding this hoarse earlier, so it took Iwaizumi a second to realize it was Oikawa, who was speaking.

“Tell me you love me, Hajime,” he whispered, and it was so quiet Iwaizumi might have missed it if he hadn’t been holding his breath.

Without hesitation, he answered. “I love you, idiot. I’ve always loved you, and I’ll never stop loving you,” he mumbled, and he could feel Oikawa shake his head. At least he figured that’s what the movement was.

It made him frown. He wasn’t sure what was wrong about what he said, so he asked. “Do you not believe me?”

Quiet again, a deep breath against his back. “My name.”

It clicked then, and he wanted to punch himself. God, if only he was better at this. Even after years of practice, it was hard getting rid of this habit. Loving insults. Usually Oikawa knew exactly what they meant, but clearly this wasn’t the moment for it.

“Oikawa. Oikawa Tooru,” he started, slowly letting go, so he could look at him this time. He needed the guy to know he was sincere.

As predicted, Oikawa didn’t like being moved, and it sort of pained Iwaizumi for a moment. After hearing him groan, he considered just letting go, but he ended up deciding against it. He had started it, so he might as well finish it.

He cupped Oikawa’s face, forcing him to look at him. Or he tried. Oikawa made sure to keep averting his gaze, looking anywhere but him.

Still, it didn’t discourage him. “Oikawa Tooru, I love you. I love you. I love you. And I’ll tell you as many times as you need to hear it.”

Unlike what Iwaizumi had expected, Oikawa started bawling even harder. It’s that ugly crying again. The breathless sobs, heaving chest, entirely disgusting face. For a moment, Iwaizumi’s eyes widened. He was panicking. Did he say something wrong again? Was he reading this whole situation wrong?

This time, Oikawa reached for the tissues himself. He was frowning when he pulled away, frowning even harder when he finally sat up again, and looked at Iwaizumi. Tears were still running down his face but it had only taken a minute or two for him to calm down enough to regain control of his breathing.

Iwaizumi knew he’d finally find out what this was about. He was right.

“Iwa-chan,” he sighed, “Hajime,” he said instead. His indecisiveness was obvious, written all over his face, as he was trying to figure out how to say whatever was bothering him.

“I can’t do this anymore,” he finally spit out, and Iwaizumi’s heart stopped.

“What?” was all he managed. His voice came out weaker than he intended. Was Oikawa seriously breaking up with him right now?

“Us,” Oikawa replied, tears freely rolling down his cheek again.

Fuck. So he was.

“You, me, like this,” the setter explained. “I wanted to break up with you by the end of this week, but today… today was so perfect,” he was fully crying now, voice breaking again, “And I just… I love you so much.”

The last word came out as a sob. Oikawa was upset again, so damn upset, but this time Iwaizumi didn’t know what to do. Was it still right to hug him, if he wanted to break up? God, he wanted to break up. That realization alone was enough to entirely overwhelm him. How was he supposed to deal with the guy breaking up with him, breaking down over the whole thing? Shouldn’t he be the one who ws upset?

Oh. Tears. He could feel them on his face.

The world felt so far away all of the sudden. What the fuck?

“Huh?” The word left his mouth before he could even think about it. He was crying as well now. Not sobbing as horribly as Oikawa, but definitely having trouble catching his breath.

And then, Oikawa launched himself into Iwaizumi’s arms, and the guy couldn’t stop himself from hugging him back. How could he not? He loved him. They were in love. Why would they break up? It didn’t make any sense.

It was how they spent an hour probably. Just crying, listening to their stupid playlist, and Iwaizumi coming to terms with the fact that he was going to have accept this.

By then, Oikawa looked tired. So, so tired. It made Iwaizumi want to just wrap him up in blankets and fall asleep together.

He couldn’t though. Neither of them could just brush it off. So, he took a deep breath, sat up slowly, and grabbed Oikawa’s hand to pull him up as well.

He noticed both of them were shaking, but he didn’t mention it. His eyes found Oikawa’s when he slowly wanted to let go again, but the guy held eye contact, just like he held onto Iwaizumi’s hand.

Both of them opened their mouths at the same time. Both of them closed them again. Iwaizumi scowled. Fuck.

“Oikawa, what the fuck?”

It came out harsher than intended. He saw Oikawa flinch, and had to cringe. Was he ruining this even more?

It took a moment, but eventually Oikawa nodded.

“I wanted to break up with you,” he started, and Iwaizumi couldn’t stop himself from interrupting. He could be patient if he wanted to be, but right now he really didn’t have the nerves. “We’ve been there before. Why?”

Oikawa nodded again, and by then it was obvious he was stalling. It was frustrating. “Quit staring off into nothingness and expla-“

“I miss you!” Oikawa finally said, and he looked close to tears again. “I miss you so much all the damn time. It’s fine when we facetime, but it’s nothing compared to the real thing. Every time I leave Japan again, I get so sad because I can’t stop thinking about you! It’s horrible. It’s a nightmare, and I don’t even have you around to hold me in those moments!” And again, he was sobbing, but he continued.

“It’s because I love you, but I can’t give up my dream for you. And I can’t expect you to give up yours then. It’s ridiculous, and horrible, and I hate the universe for doing this to us.”

Iwaizumi stared, and he hated that Oikawa was right. He joined him in his sobs, his tears, his cries. He couldn’t stop himself.

It was fine, or maybe he had been lying to himself this whole time?

He didn’t know. He wasn’t sure about anything anymore, but even worse than that? He didn’t know how to fix this. He didn’t want to break up, but he couldn’t force the guy he loved to torture himself. If Oikawa wanted to break up, he couldn’t stop him.

“I love you,” Oikawa said, finally breaking the silence. Iwaizumi nodded. Oikawa grabbed his face this time.

“I love you too,” he replied, frowning to stop himself from letting out another sob.

“I don’t want to break up with you. I’m sorry. I wish…”

“I know.”

And Iwaizumi did know, because he felt the exact same way.

They fell asleep like that. Sheets wet from their tears, arm in arm, kissing each other, even though they knew it would make all of it worse, make things harder when they woke up.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading :) Feel free to point out any mistakes, etc


End file.
